In our continuing blitzkrieg on the publishing industry, an heroic effort to teraform the stale airless wastes of literary fiction into an environment fit for human habitation; the Jackdaw Fool Comedy Network have joined forces with literary giant Pamela Nerfgurgler to present a series which will change the way the written word is written.
The past decade has seen a dizzying succession of literary fads – from sexy vampires, to victorian whodunnits, to urban fantasies, to true life tragedies, to apocalyptic popular sciencies. Each of these purse bursting subgenres is possessed of its own charms, but none have come close to the lid grating, pupil salting, fingertip shredding brilliance of the ubergenre we propose today.
The scions of literary fiction, holed up in their ivory towers, with their barley water moats, and great echoing concrete silos of uncut first editions, cry out as one for the next literary sensation. Deep in their subterranean simian typing pools, troops of furred and winged minions toil day and night to produce new synergies for focus grouping – sexy faries, zombie victoriana, talmudic crime fighters, and erotic children’s poetry – all have been spoon fed to a public hungry for their next sweet treat: Only to be sicked up by a common man starving for sweeter fair.
To those incumbent publishers we display our bright red baboon arses. We’ve beaten them to the punch, and soon they will kneel before us begging for a golden squirt to quench their cracked and peeling lips.
Without further ado – allow us to present madame Nerfgurgler’s masterpiece, the first in a fifty two volume series, with movie options, stage adaptations, and soft velvet plushies to follow. ‘Tripood, Lord of Canterers’, tells the story of a brave and noble ‘sexy centaur’, transported by Cobrapelt, queen of the Snake Ponies, far from the bountiful and Homeric lands of his people. Finding himself trapped in present day New York, Tripod must team up with a group of charmingly quirky twenty some-things, and face the cruel lights as he embarks on a career in a Broadway musical.