Note: This open letter was written back when Marshmellow was a Piranha. As it refers to events relating to Piranha magazine, we’ve left it unedited.
Everyone here on the Piranha! Editorial team would like to warmly extend our congratulations Mr Daire Hickey on his brilliantly illuminating article in last weekend’s Irish Mail on Sunday.
I must confess our shock to see the article printed in that fine newspaper when Mr Hickey himself had made it very clear that it was the Sunday Independent that had commissioned him to write this story, and that he himself did not come up with it at all. Could it be that Mr Hickey lied to us? Or that the Irish Independent would not run the story after someone contacted us to check the facts and found out that the magazine has not been pulled, banned or anything else? Could it be that Mr Hickey, desperate to see his name in the muddy off-black of newspaper ink, decided to shill the non-story to the only newspaper in Ireland with, allegedly, lower editorial standards than the Sindo? Naturally we refuse to believe such things about someone who is such a pillar of the Trinity community.
How you must hate copy editors, Mr Hickey, when they ruin what I’m sure was originally a very beautifully written piece, full of flourishes and pomp. Surely you didn’t write “Dean Stokes carpeted the editor, Andrew Booth, and a number of contributors last week.” I mean, Dr Stokes has never, ever carpeted, upholstered or even thought about popping a nice throw over a student. This is libel Mr Hickey. It is also suggested that Dr Stokes is specifically targeted, when no-one at all is specifically targetted.
Worst of all, that damnable copy editor also seems to have cut the paragraph where you declared that your interest in the story. I don’t doubt for a second that you included the fact that you stood, along with your partner Gearoid O’Rourke, against me for the position of Editor of Piranha! Magazine. How bad-natured the copy editor must have been to cut this information.
Still, we would like to thank Mr Hickey for his sterling attempts to ensure more people enjoy the fine work being done in Piranha! this year.
All the best for the future,
Editor, Piranha Magazine